A mockumentary about a mad scientist behind the creation of some insane, insane, rides. Love it!
A fuckload of classic literature:
- 1984 by George Orwell
- A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
- A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
- A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
- Aesop’s Fables by Aesop
- Agnes Grey by Anne Brontë
- Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Caroll
- Andersen’s Fairy Tales by Hans Christian Andersen
- Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery
- Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
- Around the World in 80 Days by Jules Verne
- Beyond Good and Evil by Friedrich Nietzsche
- Bleak House by Charles Dickens
- Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky
- David Copperfield by Charles Dickens
- Down and Out in Paris and London by George Orwell
- Dracula by Bram Stoker
- Dubliners by James Joyce
- Emma by Jane Austen
- Erewhon by Samuel Butler
- For the Term of His Natural Life by Marcus Clarke
- Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
- Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
- Grimms Fairy Tales by the brothers Grimm
- Gulliver’s Travels by Jonathan Swift
- Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
- Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
- Kidnapped by Robert Louis Stevenson
- Lady Chatterly’s Lover by D. H. Lawrence
- Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
- Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
- Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert
- Middlemarch by George Eliot
- Moby Dick by Herman Melville
- Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen
- Nostromo: A Tale of the Seaboard by Joseph Conrad
- Notes from the Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky
- Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham
- Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens
- Paradise Lost by John Milton
- Persuasion by Jane Austen
- Pollyanna by Eleanor H. Porter
- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
- Robinson Crusoe by Daniel Defoe
- Sense and Sensibility, by Jane Austen
- Sons and Lovers by D. H. Lawrence
- Swanns Way by Marcel Proust
- Tarzan of the Apes by Edgar Rice Burroughs
- Tender is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald
- Tess of the d’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy
- The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
- The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
- The Brothers Karamazov, by Fyodor Dostoevsky
- The Great Gatsby
- The Hound of the Baskervilles by Arthur Conan Doyle
- The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky
- The Iliad by Homer
- The Island of Doctor Moreau by H. G. Wells
- The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling
- The Last of the Mohicans by James Fenimore Cooper
- The Legend of Sleepy Hollow by Washington Irving
- The Odyssey by Homer
- The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood by Howard Pyle
- The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka
- The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
- The Portrait of a Lady by Henry James
- The Prince by Nicolo Machiavelli
- The Scarlet Pimpernel by Baroness Orczy
- The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson
- The Tales of Mother Goose by Charles Perrault
- The Thirty Nine Steps by John Buchan
- The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Duma
- The Time Machine by H. G. Wells
- The Trial by Franz Kafka
- The War of the Worlds by H. G. Wells
- Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson
- Ulysses by James Joyce
- Utopia by Sir Thomas More
- Vanity Fair by William Makepeace Thackeray
- Within A Budding Grove by Marcel Proust
- Women In Love by D. H. Lawrence
- Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
Click on the motherfucking Hypelinks bitches.
Here! Have a fuckload of modern literature, too!
- A Clockwork Orange - Anthony Burgess
- A Study In Scarlet - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
- Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter - Seth Grahame-Smith
- An Abundance of Katherines - John Green
- Artemis Fowl - Eoin Colfer
- Bossypants - Tina Fey
- Breakfast At Tiffany’s - Truman Capote
- Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
- Catcher In The Rye - J.D. Salinger
- Charlie And The Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
- City of Bones - Cassandra Clare
- Clockwork Angel - Cassandra Clare
- Damned - Chuck Palahniuk
- Darkly Dreaming Dexter - Jeff Lindsay
- Dead Until Dark - Charlaine Harris
- Ender’s Game - Orson Scott Card
- Everything Is Illuminated - Jonathan Safran Foer
- Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close - Jonathan Safran Foer
- Fahrenheit 451 - Ray Bradbury
- Fight Club - Chuck Palahniuk
- Go The Fuck To Sleep - Adam Mansbach
- I Am America (And So Can You!) - Stephen Colbert
- I Am Number Four - Pittacus Lore
- Inkheart - Cornelia Funke
- It - Stephen King
- Life of Pi - Yann Martel
- Lolita - Vladmir Nabokov
- Marked - Kristin Cast
- Memoirs Of A Geisha - Arthur Golden
- My Sister’s Keeper - Jodi Picoult
- Never Let Me Go - Kazuo Ishiguro
- One Day - David Nicholls
- Paper Towns - John Green
- Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightening Thief - Rick Riordan
- Pretty Little Liars - Sara Shepard
- Slaughterhouse Five - Kurt Vonnegut
- Snow White And The Huntsman - Lily Blake
- The Book Thief - Markus Zusak
- The Bourne Identity - Robert Ludlum
- The Giver - Lois Lowry
- The Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins
- The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
- The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
- The Notebook - Nicholas Sparks
- The Outsiders - S.E. Hinton
- The Perks of Being A Wallflower - Stephen Chbosky
- The Princess Diaries - Meg Cabot
- The Things They Carried - Tim O’Brien
- The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
- The Ultimate Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy - Douglas Adams
- Tuesdays With Morrie - Mitch Albom
- Uglies - Scott Westerfeld
- Vampire Diaries: The Awakening - L.J. Smith
- Water For Elephants - Sara Gruen
- Wicked - Gregory Maguire
This is, ladies and gentlemen, a picture of sad perkedel.
Sad perkedel, like its name, looks really, really sad. Miserably sad. It breaks my heart to look at the picture of sad perkedel. It looks like it’s there as a result of some cruel, arbitrary conception. A crooked sense of humor, perhaps. Only it was not initially meant to be a joke.
Sad perkedel, dear universe, are my creation.
Its grotesque nature was never intentional. Perkedel is actually an Indonesian version of Dutch’s frikadeller, a dumpling of ground meat and mashed potatoes, dunk in egg white and deep fried. A simple dish, really. Or at least that’s how I thought it would be.
Obviously forgetting the fact that I am a nightmare when it comes to cooking. Even for something as simple as perkedel.
On the night when sad perkedel was conceived, I had thought that it was a good idea to cook for my husband. He had been busy with his papers and essays from school that I had wanted to make him a nice meal. I had never made a Perkedel in my life before, but I had read the recipe and it looked easy peasy.
As it happened, I spent 15 minutes peeling off the potatoes, another 15 minutes peeling the shallots and garlic WHILE bawling my eyes out crying, then more than 45 minutes trying to mash the goddamn potatoes in the mortar and pestle. That’s not mentioning the hot damn mess of a kitchen I made at the end of the whole ordeal. Worse than a shipwreck, as my mother would aptly phrase it.
The result was the sad perkedel in the picture. Which looks horribly deformed, compared to this, for instance.
As sad as it was, we still ended up eating the sad perkedel. My husband said it didn’t taste so bad. I believed him, in terms of the taste, it’s kind of hard, really, to fuck up with mash potatoes and ground meat. Will I attempt to make another perkedel? Maybe. But perhaps less emo next time.
We count time in peanuts, my husband and I. And woot this is actually the first time that I refer him as “husband” in this blog. It sounds a little odd, but it feels right. It’s like that off-key note in a song that fits the music somehow, almost intentional. I like it.
But back to the peanuts business, it’s a habit that started a while ago at times when we’re often separated by distance for many reasons. It’s always excruciating to be away from your loved ones, no? It always summons the cranky, bitter witch out of me. So he started to send me text messages every day when we’re away, counting down the day when we’re going to finally reunite again. 32 peanuts in a bowl, 31 peanuts in a bowl, 30 peanuts in a bowl. And so on and so forth. And when it’s only 1 peanut in a day left, we would count the hours in peanuts. It will be 24 peanuts to 1, to none, nada, zero.
(To clarify things, no when it’s down to hours, we dont send each other text messages every peanut. That would make me totally NUTS. Ha-ha okay that was not funny)
Since then it became our habit, our word. We count times, especially when it is related to us two, in peanuts. Why peanuts? I don’t know. I guess it’s just a random word that was thrown in the moment, that ended up bunked snugly in the corner of our cheesy words dictionary.
Come to think of it, we did invent a lot of nonsense words together. It’s never intentional. It’s just sort of happens. I guess both of us likes to talk in gibberish and we like to laugh at each other’s babbles and baloney a lot. It’s never something that we crafted, it just seeps to our heads and stays.
And it’s fricking cheesy. And weird. If you ask me, I am sure I wont remember all, but I think I can name a few.
Solicitor = Bolster pillow
Pampereddick = A state of lying down perpendicular on the bed
Kekunya = A state of being full (of food), and comfortable at the same time
Doodooish = A state of being really, really sick
Tren Bedo = Bed
Brenda = My left boob
Stella = My right boob
Brenda & Stella = boobs
There are still plenty of more. But I guess the weird thing is, I never really remember them all. They’re completely random, bizarre, pointless and irrelevant in my daily social interaction with other people (and believe me, I think I kind of know how to communicate in a less dopey manner with other people), so I lock them out in the back of my head I guess. Until I come back home and start mumbling jibber jabber twiddle twaddle with someone who also speaks my language :)
The Marvelous Misadventure of the Twosome Klutz #6
- Him: Babe I got a question.
- Her: *waking up* ... huh? What's up?
- Him: Why did I sleep in the kitchen last night?
- Her: Eh? Huh? What?
- Him: Why did I sleep in the kitchen last night?
- Her: But you didn't. You fell asleep here, next to me, last night. We were spooning and watching The Simpsons before we fell asleep.
- Him: But I woke up in the kitchen.
- Her: What do you mean??
- Him: I woke up in the kitchen. I was lying on the kitchen floor with two pillows.
- Her: What are you talking about???
- Him: I was sleeping in the kitchen floor. How did that happen?
- Her: How did that happen???
- Him: Hey I asked the question first!
“The lifestyle tips laid out eschew any spiritual claptrap; instead they jump
between whimsical factoids and unambiguous notes on u
nderstanding and surviving the daily routine.” - Jakarta Globe
Click on title for the full review of my book ;)
(Pic is courtesy of Siswanto Sidharta)